Jefferson Review

"Your Liberty is Our Interest"

March 14, 2005

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THE HORMONE WARNING: The Hormone Hostage knows that there are days in the month when all a man has to do is open his mouth and he takes his life in his own hands! This is a handy guide that should be as common as adriver's license in the wallet of every husband, boyfriend, or  significant
other!
>        DANGEROUS: What's for dinner?
>        SAFER: Can I help you with dinner?
>        SAFEST: Where would you like to go for dinner?
>        ULTRA SAFE: Have some chocolate
>
>        DANGEROUS: Are you wearing that?
>        SAFER: Wow, you look good in brown.
>        SAFEST: WOW! Look at you!
>        ULTRA SAFE: Have some chocolate
>
>        DANGEROUS: What are you so worked up about?
>        SAFER: Could we be overreacting?
>        SAFEST: Here's my paycheck.
>        ULTRA SAFE: Have some chocolate
>
>        DANGEROUS: Should you be eating that?
>        SAFER: You know, there are a lot of apples left.
>        SAFEST: Can I get you a glass of wine with that?
>        ULTRA SAFE: Have some chocolate
>
>        DANGEROUS: What did you do all day?
>        SAFER: I hope you didn't over-do it today.
>        SAFEST: I've always loved you in that robe!
>        ULTRA SAFE: Have some more chocolate.
>
>       Things PMS Stands For
>        1. Pass My Shotgun
>        2. Psychotic Mood Shift
>        3. Perpetual Munching Spree
>        4. Puffy Mid-Section
>        5. People Make me Sick
>        6. Provide Me with Sweets
>        7. Pardon My Sobbing
>        8. Pimples May Surface
>        9. Pass My Sweatpants
>        10. Potential Murder Suspect

 

 

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