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Virus problems, - BEWARE


      Watch out for these new viruses - Neither
Symantec nor McAfee have solutions as yet!!!


The Clinton Virus - Gives you a permanent Hard
Drive with NO memory.

The Al Gore Virus - Causes your computer to just
keep counting and re-counting.

The John Kerry virus - causes the floppy to flip
flop on its stored memory. 
 
The Bob Dole(aka Viagra) Virus - Makes a new hard drive out of
an old floppy.

The Lewinsky Virus - Sucks all the memory out of
your computer, then e-mails everyone about what it
did.

The Arnold Schwarzenegger Virus - Terminates some
files, leaves, but will be back.

The Mike Tyson Virus - Quits after two bytes.

The Oprah Winfrey Virus - Your 200 GB hard drive
shrinks to 100 GB, then slowly expands to
re-stabilize around 150 GB.


The Prozac Virus - Totally screws up your RAM, but
your processor doesn't care.

The Joey Buttafuoco Virus - Only attacks minor
files.

The Lorena Bobbitt Virus - Reformats your hard drive
into a 3.5 inch floppy... then discards it through
Windows.

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