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SURVEY SAYS!
In a HYPOTHETICAL match-up, which of these tickets do think would give
Bush/Cheney the toughest run for their money next November?
1.) Kerry/Edwards (Democrat ticket)
2.) McCain/Lieberman (Independent ticket)
3.) Clark/Hillary Clinton (Democrat ticket)
4.) Dean/Gephardt (Democrat ticket)
5.) Sharpton/Kucinich? (Loony Toon ticket)
Cast your ballot today by clicking on the "Survey Says!" button at
www.citizenoutreach.com
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ANOTHER LEFT-RIGHT CONFLICT
>From a News & Views reader: "Left brain, right brain. While sitting down,
lift your right foot off the floor and make clockwise circles. Now, while
doing this, draw the number '6' in the air with your right hand. Your foot
will change direction and there's nothing you can do about it."
INQUIRING MINDS WANNA KNOW
"(T)he Bush (immigration amnesty) plan raises a lot more questions than it
answers. Will all 10 million illegal aliens now in the United States be
entitled to get a temporary-worker card? Will the millions who don't apply
for a temporary-worker card be deported? How many times can the
temporary-worker card be renewed? Once, twice, twenty times? Since President
Bush said, 'It will have an end,' will the workers be deported when the card
expires? Will local authorities cooperate with the Federal Government in
arrest and deportation?
"Bush promised 'financial incentives' for 'temporary workers to return
permanently to their home countries after their period of work in the United
States has expired.' Will this become another burden on the U.S. taxpayers?
. . . Will those who get temporary-worker cards also get driver's licenses?
If so, what kind of I.D. will be acceptable? . . . Will the temporary
foreign workers be entitled to bring all their relatives into the United
States? Will their babies born during their temporary work be called U.S.
citizens and be eligible for welfare benefits and the right to bring all
their relatives into the U.S.?"
- Phyllis Schlafly of the Eagle Forum
EENIE, MEENID, MINIE, MOE.
...This dumb lawsuit's got to go. So said a Kansas City jury this week
after a two-day trial in which Southwest Airlines flight attendant Jennifer
Cundiff was sued for saying into the airplane intercom three years ago the
following: "Eenie, meenie, minie, moe; pick a seat, we got to go." Seems
two black passengers who were among many standing in the aisle at the time
decided the rhyme was racist and directed at them.
Fortunately, the jury laughed them out of court, taking less than one hour
to reach their verdict. But there still needs to be a penalty imposed on
idiots who bring these idiotic lawsuits in the first place if we're ever
going to curb such expensive idiocy in the future. Eenie, meenie, minie,
moe; loser pays is the way to go.
DISORDER IN THE COURTS
"While some malpractice suits are obviously legitimate, studies show as many
as 80 percent are hogwash. Not a few are wholly outlandish but bring in
multimillion-dollar awards anyway. It's because insurance companies can't be
sure when luck will be with them in this roll of the dice that they settle
cases they think they should be able to win."
- Columnist Jay Ambrose
DIRTY HARRY SEZ LET GAYS MARRY
In Saturday's USA Weekend magazine, legendary film actor/director Clint
Eastwood talked about his live-and-let-live political philosophy. "Even as
a kid," said the former mayor of Carmel, California, "I was annoyed by
people who wanted to tell everyone how to live." Asked if his "leave
everyone alone" political views extended to same-sex marriage, Eastwood's
response couldn't have been said better by Tommy Jefferson himself. "You
have to believe in total equality," the 73-year-old said. "People should be
what they want to be and do what they want - as long as they're not harming
people."
Who can argue with that?
COUNTRY SAYS "NO" TO MARRIAGE AMENDMENT
"Most Americans agree with President Bush's opposition to same-sex
marriage - but most also oppose amending the U.S. Constitution to ban it,
saying instead that it should be a matter for the individual states to
decide.
"...In this ABCNEWS/Washington Post survey, 38 percent of Americans favor
amending the U.S. Constitution to make it illegal for homosexual couples to
marry, but 58 percent say, instead, that each state should make its own laws
on gay marriage.
"That's not an endorsement of same-sex marriages - indeed most, 55 percent,
say such marriages should be illegal. Instead it suggests a public judgment
that the issue doesn't merit pre-empting the states and amending the U.S.
Constitution."
- ABC News.com, 1/21/04
DEPENDS ON YOUR DEFINITION OF "POOR"
".(A) new study suggests the poor (in the United States) aren't so poor.
According to a recent study by the Heritage Foundation, 46 percent of the
technically 'poor' live in their own homes, most with more living space than
the average person in Paris, London or Vienna. While 73 percent own at least
one car, 30 percent own two or more, and 76 percent have air conditioning.
Also, according to the study, 65 percent have a washing machine, 97 percent
have a color TV and 78 percent have a DVD player or VCR."
- FoxNews.com, 1/23/04
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PATRIOT FACING ROUGH ROAD
"House Judiciary Committee Chairman F. James Sensenbrenner Jr., Wisconsin
Republican, yesterday made it clear that the Republican House is not about
to roll over for President Bush on the Patriot Act. . . . Mr. Sensenbrenner,
a member of the House Homeland Security Committee, said 'over my dead body'
will the act be reauthorized without undergoing thorough re-examination in
hearings held by the House."
- Greg Pierce's "Inside Politics," 1/23/04
HEAD START COURTS MAJOR EMBARRASSMENT
The dubiously effective but highly expensive Head Start program lost a round
in court this week when a federal judge ruled its leaders had to provide
Congress with a detailed report itemizing the salaries and travel expenses
of its state-based executives. News reports popped up last year exposing
whopping salaries in the $200,000-300,000 range plus generous bonuses for
luxury cars and out-of-state travel. Head Start funding is slated to
receive an additional $148 million this year, added to a staggering budget
of $6.7 BILLION to service 912,000 poor children.
Now, I went to publik skoolz for a few years and don't have a calculator
handy. How much does that come down to per child? And wouldn't it be a
hell of a lot cheaper to just give each of those poor kids a voucher to
attend the day care center of their parents' choice instead of running this
as a government program?
IN SEARCH OF MEDIOCRITY
It started on little league baseball and soccer fields. Goofy communities
around the country stopped keeping score in competitive sports for
youngsters so that the losers wouldn't get their tender little egos bruised.
If you don't keep score, goes the thinking, there will be no losers and
every kid will feel special.
What a crock.
But this crock has now reached its way into academics. Down in Nashville,
Tennessee, all schools have been instructed to stop posting honor rolls.
Indeed, according to the Associated Press, "some schools are also
considering a ban on hanging good work in the hallways." All on the advise
of our friends...the lawyers.
"After a few parents complained that their children might be ridiculed for
not making the (honor roll) list, school system lawyers warned that state
privacy laws forbid releasing any academic information, good or bad, without
permission."
AP further reports that some Nashville schools have since killed academic
pep rallies and others are mulling a ban on spelling bees. Making matters
worse, AP also reports that other schools across the state are thinking of
following Nashville's lead.
And lawyers wonder why non-lawyers continue to hate lawyers? And why more
and more people are electing to home-school their kids?
NO STATE'S RIGHTS LEFT BEHIND
"In a backlash to President Bush's signature education program, Virginia's
Republican-controlled House of Delegates approved a resolution calling on
Congress to exempt the state from the requirement of the No Child Left
Behind Act. The act 'represents the most sweeping intrusions into state and
local control of education in the history of the United States' and will
cost 'millions of dollars that Virginia does not have,' the resolution says.
In passing the resolution 98-1, Virginia lawmakers loudly echoed concerns in
other states about the effects of No Child Left Behind, which became law in
2002. . . . In Utah, the Republican-led legislature is considering voting to
try to opt out of the program entirely."
- Associated Press, 1/24/04
A CHICKEN IN EVERY POT - 2004
"Nearly every candidate promises perfection in nearly everything. Elect me,
they say, and every sick person will have access to the world's best
physician. Every student will study with the world's best professor. Those
who worked for pets.com will get their old jobs back. Nobody will every
again be even slightly hungry, and the national obesity crisis will end.
John Edwards stops just short of guaranteeing it will rain only at night.
But overpromising is a bipartisan affliction, illustrated by the cliché that
no child, regardless how lazy and ill-behaved, will ever be 'left behind.' "
- Alan Reynolds of the Cato Institute
BIG GOVERNMENT WITH ALL THE FIXIN'S
"Bill Clinton felt our pain so deeply there was no price he was not willing
to have taxpayers bear to make us feel better. . . . Mr. Bush too, has this
unattractive tendency to believe there is a government agency to fix every
leaky pipe in the nation. Mr. Bush may not have announced a national
campaign to eradicate athlete's foot (in his state of the union address),
but it wouldn't have been much of a stretch if he had."
- Steve Moore, president of Club for Growth
THIS IS YOUR CONGRESS ON DRUGS
"Unfortunately, the president's ban on steroids doesn't apply to the
appropriators."
- Unnamed GOP senate aide, New York Times, 1/22/04
GIVIN' IT THE OL' COLLEGE TRY
"Some Republicans were very unhappy (with passage of the $820 billion
omnibus spending bill). Rep. Jeff Flake, Arizona Republican, complained its
passage was a victory for 'big spenders' and that Republicans crafted, 'a
bloated bill, with billions of dollars in earmarks' for lawmakers. 'I don't
know that you can ever make Democrats happy on the spending side, but we
sure did try,' he said."
- Washington Times, 1/23/04
GIVE US A CUT, NOT A FREEZE
"We want to reduce spending on nondefense and nonterror-related issues, not
just limit (the growth of) spending to zero on these issues."
- Rep. Tom Feeney (R-Fla.) at this year's CPAC conference
NEW MATH
For Tom Lehrer fans, you'll recall the classic 1960s song about "New Math."
Seems the movement to teach kids that one plus one doesn't necessarily have
to equal two, so long as you can explain the process you used to get to the
wrong answer, has worked its way up into the highest levels of government
and political activism. The latest example comes to us from John Irons of
OMB Watch who this week criticized the President's proposal to limit the
growth of discretionary spending. "A 1 percent increase means a cut in
programs," declared Mr. Irons. If only such new math actually added up.
CONSERVATIVE NATIVES PRETTY RESTLESS
"President Bush is in trouble with his conservative voting base over
immigration, excessive spending by the Republican majority in Congress, and
the expansion of government that his initiatives are producing, said
Republican lawmakers, party leaders and activists yesterday. But they
strongly support Mr. Bush on four issues they consider crucial: a strong
national defense, homeland security, the war on terrorism and cutting taxes.
" 'Conservatives know that if you reject principles of limited government
and urge others to reject them, you can be my ally, you can be my friend -
but you cannot call yourself a conservative,' Rep. Mike Pence, Indiana
Republican, told political activists at the annual, three-day Conservative
Political Action Conference in Arlington. Mr. Pence cited as major blows to
limited government the 2001 enactment of No Child Left Behind, which he
called the largest expansion of the Department of Education since President
Carter created it, and the passage last year of the $400 billion Medicare
prescription-drug bill, the largest new entitlement since 1965."
- Ralph Hallow, Washington Times, 1/23/04
BACK TO THE DRAWING BOARD
"The president and his men were dead certain sure they had the right man
(Howard Dean) in their cross hairs. But they didn't, and now it's back to
Karl Rove's drawing board.
"...Since (the President's) opponent was to be the former governor, who
could be effectively portrayed as Freddy Krueger from the 'Nightmare on Elm
Street,' enough to scare the pants off a spinster schoolteacher, the
president's men thought he could safely ignore his conservative base because
his best friends wouldn't have anywhere else to go. Conservatives would
reckon they couldn't even indulge the luxury of staying home on Election
Day. The president could chase voters elsewhere.
"George Bush the elder succumbed to similarly expensive wisdom in 1988, when
his wise men told him to tone down who everyone thought he was, raise taxes
and go gentle into the stormy night with Bill Clinton. The rest is history."
- Wesley Pruden, "Pruden On Politics," 1/23/04
HIGH RISK STRATEGY
"(George W. Bush's state of the union address) revealed his deep suspicion
of human freedom. Yes, he says he supports it. But in every instance--even
charitable and religious institutions--he believes that government needs to
get involved. He wants to maintain the Patriot Act intact; he wants to
extend the war on drugs to steroids; he wants to prevent gay couples from
having the ability to form their own families and be treated equally under
the law. He suggests not a single government program to be cut.
"...This is not Reaganism. It isn't Gingrichism. It's Big Government Moral
Conservatism: fiscally liberal and socially conservative. It will please the
hard right and the base. And it will alienate libertarians and moderates. It
struck me as a speech that comes out of a political cocoon, from a president
who doesn't grasp that he is in fact politically vulnerable, and who intends
to run not on what he plans for the future but on what he has done in the
past."
- Columnist Andrew Sullivan
HOUSTON, WE HAVE A PROBLEM
"Sen. John Kerry, riding the wave of popularity from his Iowa caucus win,
would now beat President Bush in a head-to-head matchup, according to the
latest poll," reports the Washington Times on Sunday morning. "A Newsweek
poll taken Jan. 22-23 of 1,006 registered voters nationwide found Mr. Kerry
winning 49 percent support in a head-to-head matchup with Mr. Bush, who
garnered 46 percent support."
Although none of the other Democrat donkey-dwarfs are beating Bush in the
poll, they all improved their standing in a head-to-head matchup.
Hmm. Seems spitting in the eyes of conservatives, not to mention the LEGAL
citizenry as a whole, is proving to be - dare I say it? - a "risky scheme."
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Chuck Muth's News & Views is published by Citizen Outreach, a non-partisan,
501(c)3 non-profit corporation. The opinions and views expressed in Chuck
Muth's News & Views reflect those of the writers, editors and columnists
therein and do not necessarily reflect the opinions of Citizen Outreach, its
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