Jefferson Review

"Your Liberty is Our Interest"

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GAMES FOR WHEN WE ARE OLDER

1. Sag, you're It.
2. Hide and go pee.
3. 20 questions (shouted into your good ear).
4. Kick the bucket
5. Red Rover, Red Rover, the nurse says Bend Over.
6. Musical recliners.
7. Simon says something incoherent.
8. Pin the Toupee on the bald guy.

SIGNS OF MENOPAUSE
1. You sell your home heating system at a yard sale.
2. You have to write post-it notes with your kids' names on them. 

3. You change your underwear after a sneeze.

OLD IS WHEN
Going bra-less pulls all the wrinkles out of your face.
Getting a little action means I don't need fiber today.
Getting lucky means you find your car in the parking lot.
An all-nighter means not getting up to pee!

A Friend Is Like A Good Bra..
Hard to Find
Supportive
Comfortable
And Always Close To Your Heart!

I signed up for an exercise class and was told to wear loose-fitting clothing. If I HAD any loose-fitting clothing, I wouldn't have signed up in the first place!

When I was young, we used to go "skinny dipping"; now I just "chunky dunk".

Wouldn't it be nice if whenever we messed up our life we could simply press 'Ctrl Alt Delete' and start all over?

Why is it that...
Brain cells come and brain cells go, but fat cells live forever?

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