Jefferson Review

"Your Liberty is Our Interest"

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Dear Tide:

I'm writing to say what an excellent product you have!
I've used it since the beginning of my married life,
when my Mom told me it was the best.

Now that I am older and going through menopause, I
find it even better!  In fact, about a month ago, I
spilled some red wine on my new white blouse. My
unfeeling and uncaring husband started to berate me
about how clumsy I was and generally started becoming
a pain in the neck.

One thing led to another and I ended up with a lot of
his blood on my white blouse. I tried to get the stain
out using a bargain detergent, but it just wouldn't
come out. After a quick trip to the supermarket, I
stopped and got a bottle of liquid Tide with bleach
alternative, and to my surprise and satisfaction, all
of the stains came out!

In fact, the stains came out so well, that some
detectives who came by yesterday told me that the DNA
tests were negative and my attorney said that I would
no longer be considered a suspect!

I thank you, once again, for having such a great
product.  Well, gotta go. I have to write a letter to
the Hefty bag people...

Signed,
A relieved menopausal wife

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