Jefferson Review

"Your Liberty is Our Interest"

December 1, 2003

Home Archives / Search / Links / Quotes / Book Reviews / Advertise /Contact us / Subscribe / Calendar

 

 

 

 

 



In Honor of Stupid People

In case you needed further proof that the human race is doomed through
stupidity, here are some actual label instructions on consumer goods.


On a Sears hairdryer: Do not use while sleeping.

(Damn, and that's the only time I have to do my hair).


On a bag of Fritos: You could be a winner! No purchase necessary. Details
inside.

(the shoplifter special)?


On a bar of Dial soap: "Directions: Use like regular soap."

(and that would be how???....)


On some Swanson frozen dinners: "Serving suggestion: Defrost."

(but, it's "just" a suggestion).


On Tesco's Tiramisu dessert (printed on bottom): "Do not turn upside
down."

(well...duh, a bit late, huh)!


On Marks & Spencer Bread Pudding: "Product will be hot after heating."

(...and you thought????...)

On packaging for a Rowenta iron: "Do not iron clothes on body."

(but wouldn't this save me more time)?


On Boot's Children Cough Medicine: "Do not drive a car or operate machinery
after taking this medication."

(We could do a lot to reduce the rate of construction accidents if we could
just get those 5-year-olds with head-colds off those forklifts.)


On Nytol Sleep Aid: "Warning: May cause drowsiness."

(and...I'm taking this because???....)


On most brands of Christmas lights: "For indoor or outdoor use only."

(as opposed to...where)?


On a Japanese food processor: "Not to be used for the other use."

(now, somebody out there, help me on this.)


On Sainsbury's peanuts: "Warning: contains nuts."

(talk about a news flash)


On an American Airlines packet of nuts: "Instructions: Open packet, eat
nuts."

(Step 3: maybe, uh...fly Delta?)


On a child's superman costume: "Wearing of this garment does not enable
you to fly."

(I don't blame the company. I blame the parents for this one.)


On a Swedish chainsaw: "Do not attempt to stop chain with your hands or
genitals."

(Oh my God .was there a lot of this happening somewhere?)


Now that you've smiled at least once, it's your turn to spread the
stupidity and send this to someone you want to bring a smile to (maybe even
chuckle)...,in other words send it to everyone. We all need to smile
every once in a while .



 

Weather (Louisville) / Mapquest / Search / White Pages / Business Search / CNN / Dictionary / E-card / MSN


Search WWWSearch www.jeffersonreview.com

To forward this article to a friend, go to your toolbar and click "file" > "send".