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The Godfather Waltz

By Gordon Francis Corbett

    Long ago, a San José, California, television station's UHF channel-number inspired its owners to advertise it as "the perfect 36."  In the wake of the movie, "The Godfather," MMM Carpets created a skit that mimicked this film, and "the perfect 36" broadcast it as a commercial during MMM Carpets' nightly movies.

    The skit showed a stereotypical Mafia boss, flanked by two very large men dressed in double-breasted suits who could only be described as "refrigerators with legs."  Stolidly funereal "Godfather"-like music played in the background, supposedly to help the boss advertise his loan business.

    Imitating Marlon Brando's wheezy semi-whisper, the boss said something like, "When your kid breaks his leg, and you need money, come see me.  When your daughter gets married, and you need money, come see me.  When you buy your new house, and you need money, come see me.  And then, when you get paid, take some money, put it in an envelope, and send it to me.  Otherwise, (tone switched from gentle to aggressive) I come see you."

    Maybe our politicians, like that skit's boss, should threaten us.  Then, at least, we would know where we stand.  Instead, candidates promise us allegedly wonderful things.  It is only after they take the offices we have given them that they send the IRS, or BATF, or land-use enforcers, or other bureaucrats to our homes, workplaces, or both, exerting the muscle that makes these, uh, "benefits" possible.

    Examples are legion.  Supposedly to fight crime, they pass "gun control" laws that steal innocent people's ability to defend themselves legally.  While shrinking our paychecks with open taxes, they create inflation to steal covertly the purchasing power of the money we have managed to save.  And, desperate to take even more, they misuse the power of eminent domain to steal good citizens' good homes so that developers can tear them down and use the space for shopping malls and factories.

    As the Founding Fathers' rule of law becomes the politicians' law of rules, our image of Uncle Sam metamorphoses into a portrait of Vito Corleone, and "The Star-Spangled Banner" fades into "The Godfather Waltz."

    Can you hear it?
 

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