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HOW DO THESE PEOPLE SURVIVE!!
Recently, when I went to McDonald's I saw on the menu that you could have
an order of 6, 9 or 12 Chicken McNuggets. I asked for a half dozen
nuggets. "We
don't have half dozen nuggets," said the teenager at the counter.
"You don't?" I replied. "We only have six, nine, or
twelve," was the reply. "So I can't order a half-dozen nuggets,
but I can order six?"
"That's right." So I shook my head and ordered six McNuggets.
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The paragraph above doesn't amaze me
because of what happened a couple of months ago. I was checking out at the
local Foodland with just a few items and the lady behind me put her things
on the belt close to mine.
I picked up one of those
"Dividers" that they keep by the cash register and placed it
between our things so they wouldn't get mixed. After the girl had scanned
all of my items, she picked up the "Divider" looking
it all over for the bar code so she could scan it.
Not finding the bar code she said to
me "Do you know how much this is?" and I said to her "I've
changed my mind, I don't think I'll buy that today." She said
"OK" and I paid her for the things and left. She had no clue to
what had just happened.....
MAKES YOU WONDER HOW THESE PEOPLE CAN SURVIVE!!!
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A lady at work was seen putting a
credit card into her floppy drive and pulling it out very quickly. When
inquired as to what she was doing, she said she was shopping on the
Internet and they kept asking for a credit card number, so she was using
the ATM "thingy".
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I recently saw a distraught young lady
weeping beside her car. Do you need some help?" I asked.
She replied, "I knew I should
have replaced the battery to this remote door unlocker. Now I can't get
into my car.
Do you think they (pointing to a distant convenient store) would have a
battery to fit this?"
"Hmmm, I dunno. Do you have
an alarm too?" I asked.
"No, just this remote
thingy," she answered, handing it and the car keys to me.
As I took the key and manually
unlocked the door, I replied, "Why don't you drive over there and
check about the batteries.
It's a long walk.
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Several years ago, we had an Intern
who was none too swift.
One day she was typing and turned to a
secretary and said, "I'm almost out of typing paper. What do I
do?"
"Just use copier machine
paper," the secretary told her.
With that, the intern took her last
remaining blank piece of paper, put it on the photocopier and proceeded to
make five "blank" copies.
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I was in a car dealership a while ago,
when a large motor home was towed into the garage. The front of the
vehicle was in dire need of repair and the whole thing generally looked
like an extra in Twister.
" I asked the manager what had
happened. He told me that the driver had set the "cruise
control" and then went
in the back to make a sandwich.
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IDIOTS AT WORK... Sign in a gas
station: Coke -- 49 cents. Two for a dollar.
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IDIOTS & COMPUTERS... My neighbor
works in the operations department in the central office of a large bank.
Employees in the field call him when they have
problems with their computers. One night he got a call from a woman in one
of the branch banks who had this question:
"I've got smoke coming from the
back of my terminal.
Do you guys have a fire
downtown?"
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IDIOTS ARE EASY TO PLEASE: I was
sitting in my science class, when the teacher commented that the next day
would be the shortest day of the year. My lab partner became visibly
excited, cheering and clapping. I explained to
him that the amount of daylight changes, not the actual amount of time.
Needless to say, he was very
disappointed.
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Police in Radnor, Pennsylvania,
interrogated a suspect by placing a metal colander on his head and
connecting
it with wires to a photocopy machine. The message
"He's lying" was placed in
the copier, and police pressed the copy button each time they thought the
suspect wasn't telling the truth.
Believing the "lie detector"
was working, the suspect confessed.
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